And You Thought You Were Quirky: the Moxy Hotel, Washington, DC

(All photos courtesy of the Moxy website except the doggie one and the exterior photo)

With a name like Moxy, you know you’re in for something unique before you even look at the website. Fortunately, I did look at the website prior to my arrival, so I was prepared for the unique layout of my room. And check-in at the bar. And toys in the lobby.

Yes, toys.

Walking in from dinner one night, I heard the loud clattering of many somethings collapsing to the floor. I saw them go down through the glass door and thought whoa, someone just did a real bad thing. Instead, I heard peals of laughter from a giant-Jenga loser. The lobby also boasted a foosball table, giant Connect Four, an air hockey table, a coin operated horse (I’m pretty sure his name is Trigger), games of every description, coloring books, and crayons.

The Moxy is about fun. If you don’t have fun staying here, you’re not doing it right.

Everywhere you look and everywhere you go in the hotel, there is something unique:  wallpaper that looks like Monopoly money, an American flag made of blue jean waistbands, rotary phones (with handy push buttons so you don’t actually have to do the whole circular-dial thing). In the basement, there are six roomy unisex public bathrooms. When you go in one, a formally framed sign says, “Have a seat.” Well, thank you, I think I will. Out front, sidewalk seating is lit overhead with strings of hot pink bulbs, a pink that matches the flamingos on the bar, the punching bag in the gym, and the hairdryers in the rooms. There’s a water bowl outside the front door for any puppy that might wander by. Holes in the shower drain spell out “Deep End.” Yeah…  

The “closet” in my closet room consisted of pegs on the wall and the clothing drawer (notice that’s not plural) was 3/4 full of a safe. I’m not entirely sure whether I was supposed to hang my delicates on the closet pegs or put them on top of the handy lap desk stored below the chair. I opted for using the provided tote bag that, if I chose, I could take home for $75. I chose not, but only because I have about a million tote bags already. Cute, right?

Speaking of closets…when I checked in, the young lady said, “We’re cozy here.” That was my first indication that my room might be area-challenged. It’s hard to put into words, but I’m relatively certain I could have fit the whole thing into #3’s college dorm room, bathroom included. Said bathroom with shower is completely glass-enclosed. The glass is opaque, so it’s not quite like looking through a window. But, if you’re sharing a room, you’ll want to make sure it’s with someone you’re super comfortable around. ‘Cause if you have it, they’re gonna see it. Still, the sensation of showering in a glass phone booth (or a booth and a half – it’s not that small), with light coming into the room from the large window or from the blind-you-bright, antique-automobile-headlight bedside lamps, is pretty cool. If you decide to stay at the Moxy in DC, or at one of the others around the country, it’s possible your room will be larger than mine. They offer queen rooms, king rooms, and double rooms. Double rooms have twin-sized bunkbeds, which would be fun for kids. (Did I mention the Moxy is Marriott-affiliated? #pointspointsbaby)

 

The Moxy lobby has a neat little grab-and-go section with all manner of munchies and drinkies. They helpfully put a “*” by items good for curing hangovers. Nice. And then there are the payment options…(see pic).

There’s also a bowl full of dog biscuits, because the Moxy is dog friendly! See? (I didn’t even choreograph this cuteness)

There’s a gym, as well as take-outable bikes in the lobby.

Gotta be honest: the thing I liked best about the Moxy was all the cleverness, probably because my humor is hovering around seventh grade. It’s better than reading OPI nail polish labels. On the second floor there’s a “library,” which is an open air loft overlooking the lobby. You can hear the commotion music without being in the thick of it. Everywhere you go, there are witty and sometimes nearly-naughty signs (sorry MaeMae and MeMe – I’m just reporting…). The jazz hands are my fav.

 

 

I highly recommend the Moxy for a quick trip with kids (because of the toys and the bunkbeds) or for anyone with a sense of adventure. Longer trips…to me, the storage would become an issue. But, I’m an old fogey and chronic over-packer. So, there’s that.

Describing the Moxy to a friend, she said, “It’s a millennial hotel.” Exactly. Millennials will love it.